Run Nelly Run

Run Nelly Run

Running through life as self-proclaimed house wife, mother, homeschooler, and wanna-be chef

Slowing Down is Tough!

Call me odd…but slowing down has been really hard for me!  I am used to running at my own leisure…if I was having a tough day a run always seemed to clear my head and get me “back into the game”.  However, this week I’ve had 2 scheduled days off from running and you all…I might be on the brink of insanity, (I feel like it is taper week x 100).MjAxMy00ZjcwMWYyMzk3NDc3MmVh

I’ve mentioned a couple times that running is “me time”, my “therapy” and I am really starting to realize how true that is for me.

What would I do if I couldn’t ever run again?

Probably go crazy.  

I am sure that the OCD part of my eating disorder has never truly left me and running has been a trade off for under eating, (I don’t think I could ever skip a meal again….but skipping a run is HARD).  

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yes!

I’d like to think though…that I am stronger then my disorder and that I really do run for more then the “control” I gain from going out.  I say this, because I really truly do love to run, but I know when I need to step back from running and let my body heal.  Last year I had mono, (with that came a double ear infection, kidney infection, and strep throat…I was miserable!) I didn’t run for a long time before and after.  Did I miss running? heck yes! but I missed feeling good more and running would have compromised my recovery.

 

I think I am realizing very quickly that with letting go of my running “schedule”…I feel like I am giving up the little bit of “control” I have in my life, (which again is completely silly).  I have an obligation to another person as well as to myself that I am going to do this running thing right and that takes a lot more mental stamina then I was prepared for.

You guys…I know…it has only been a week of having someone else call the shots with running…but, I also deal with a lot of unknown variables and my constant is getting a much needed facelift….agh! change!  cbea1a811c0da92583b264cf0f7adafe

Rant done! thank you for listening.  

Do any of you runners out there struggle with the same demons?  I know I cannot be the only one who has a hard time taking a day away from running…or I could i really just be that crazy =)

 

 

 

 

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2 Comments

  • Val Stadick says:

    I think most of us who run have demons that we are trying to either run away from or quash somehow with each step . . .my list is huge. Bad relationships, addictions — it’s the only place sometimes where we can go and truly feel free and loved and empowered.
    I am currently injured and have been for quite a while and though I know I do okay now when I can’t run (I still don’t smoke or . ) I do much better when I do run. I have been filling in that nervous void with things that I would normally laugh about as in I have about 20 hats I have crocheted last month. Just trying to keep the demons at bay. Haha.

    • Danielle says:

      Val, I think that is true for most of us runners…which probably what bonds most of us. My husband always says that we all have vices! I am thankful one of my biggest vices is the need for movement…suppose there could be worse things to be addicted to. I am so glad to hear that you are finding a way to fill your void…I am not good at anything crochet or knitting related! I admire those who are.

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